"...I fear there can be no possible doubt about the matter. This afternoon during my temporary absence in London on an important question of romance he obtained admission to my house by means of the false pretence of being my brother. Under an assumed name he drank I've just been informed by my butler an entire pint bottle of my Perrier-Jouet Brut '89; wine I was specially reserving for myself. Continuing his disgraceful deception he succeeded in the course of the afternoon in alienating the affections of my only ward. He subsequently stayed to tea and devoured every single muffin. And what makes his conduct all the more heartless is that he was perfectly well aware from the first that I have no brother that I never had a brother and that I don't intend to have a brother not even of any kind. I distinctly told him so myself yesterday afternoon..."